For some reason that continues to escape me there is a notion floating around that guilt and shame are bad things and, worse, that they are the same emotion. I want to curtail the latter before getting too much further. Guilt and Shame are two completely different emotions.
Guilt comes into play when a person feels bad for their actions, knowing that they have done something wrong. What happens with guilt is that the person will move toward making up for the error made. May not always fix the problem but at least this person moves in the right direction. The guilty person seeks reconciliation with individuals, with communities, and with God, just to name a few. You will notice that this is not a title that can be assigned to a person. When a person is decided guilty by law they have to take the step of restoration on their own.
The opposite is true for the person who is ashamed. The person who is ashamed is aware that something is wrong but cannot pinpoint what exactly the problem is or how it can be fixed. Shame has a habit of pushing us in all directions except the one that allows us to fix the problem we started. To use a Biblical example, look at the story of Adam and Eve. God gave one instruction, "Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil," and up until they ate of the fruit they were, "Naked and without shame." (More on that later.) Upon eating the fruit they hid from one-another and from God. What did they see? By eating the fruit they saw what humans could be capable of doing to one-another. They wronged God, with whom they had a perfect relationship, who did not want humankind to know the evils that humans are capable of, and hid from Him instead of attempting to make amends (Genesis 2:4-3:24).
Just a way to get a few thoughts across outside of the office. In this blog you may even find entries that assist in your healing without needing a session